Rob Sissell
Chief Executive
Comet Group plc
George Street

Dear Rob

I am the Express Newspaper’s Official Complainer and I write on behalf of Mr Paul Richardson (e-mail whose note to me is enclosed.

Paul bought a fridge freezer from your Internet site. It doesn’t work when it’s cold. How odd.

When he complained that the machine had spontaneously defrosted you told him to plough though the permafrost of his instruction manual. There, deep below the polar ice-cap of page eleven, he found small (but perfectly preserved) print which stated: “Do not put your fridge freezer in a cold room where the temperature is likely to go below 10 degrees C”. You will doubtless tell me that this extraordinary proposition is true but the nub of Paul’s gripe is that there was no advanced warning of this fatal thaw. Paul’s acquisition has been a frozen waste of money because he intended to keep the freezer in his garage, as do so many people. As you know, temperatures in Britain have been know to fall below 10 degrees C.

Now is the winter of Paul’s discontent. Please bring glorious summer to him by instructing your customer service team to chill out and give him a full refund.

Yours sincerely

Jasper Griegson