A good complaint is one that stands out from all the others. Writing in verse can be very effective. The following is a shining example of such a letter. the result of which was compensation in the form of two complimentary business class tickets to anywhere in the world. It was written to the then Managing Director of British Airways Bob Ayling. The point about a complaint of this kind that it grabs the attention of the reader and distinguishes itself from all the other boring complaints. What you want when you are complaining is a one-to-one dialogue with a real human being rather than an idiot at a call centre or a computer in Birmingham. Verse is one way to achieve that objective.
The The Levitts like to fly BA,
They say that it’s the only way,
For long-haul flights and short-haul too,
They say that nothing else will do.
Accordingly they chose BA,
When jetting off to San Jose,
On their return the tale they tale,
Was nothing less than the flight from hell.
The plane was cramped – they realised when,
They saw it was a DC-10.
The three hour delay was not much fun,
Nor was the diversion to San Juan!
After 90 minutes of stewing there,
It was plain the plane was going nowhere,
At 6-30am just for a lark,
The passengers were told to disembark.
During four hours waiting no one slept a wink,
There was no information no food or drink,
The lounge was dirty and very hot,
Did BA care? BA did not.
On borad again the passengers flocked,
To the toilets that were permanently blocked,
For the Levitts this was the final straw,
I hard need to add much more.
The Levitts treatment was a dastardly crime
And on that note I’ll end this rhyme.